After seven years of (mostly rocky) marriage, Reese Witherspoon and Ryan Phillipe have decided to part ways.
It's about time Reese got rid of that loser. She could do a lot better. Like me, for example.
Think about it. We're both ridiculously talented, unimaginably attractive, and wise beyond our years.
I also don't mind being whipped (since it comes with the perks of living in a mansion and going to the hottest Hollywood parties). And, if in seven years, she decides it's just not working out, that's cool. I'll just take a Bentley or two on my way out.
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